The Beauty of the Simplified Divorce

Every time I see a story about divorce, it’s about how difficult it is. It’s costly, it’s emotionally ugly, it’s hotly contested on every point. There is drama and tears and people fighting over every scrap of clothing and every plate in the china set. There are kids that everyone wants all the time, and the kids are miserable and being traumatized. It really sounds like an awful process.

And I suppose it can be, but that’s not my experience. My experience was pretty straightforward, relatively cheap, and painless. I recommend it to everyone who ever considers getting a divorce. I mean, there’s a reason they call it “simplified,” right?

Of course, things are easier for me. I don’t have kids, and I don’t want them. I like to keep my possessions to a limit. I don’t own a house, and I don’t plan to. My car is just a junker. I’ve also married reasonable people who were smart enough and self-aware enough to know when things were over.

All of that checks all the boxes on the list, and it has allowed me not one, not two, but three simplified divorces in my life.

So, do you qualify for this wonderful little bit of legal magic? Well, according to the Law Office of Andrew A. Bestafka, Esq., you need at least three things to be true:

-No young kids (that means no kids under 18). If you have kids, that’s a complication you can’t get around, since you will both owe something to them, whether it’s money or custody or probably both. Like everything with kids, they make things more difficult.

-Both people in the marriage agree the marriage is over. Apparently, that’s not always the case. Someone still holds a little bit of a torch for the other one or they just can’t see the writing on the wall. If only one person wants out, you again have a complication, which means no fast lane for you.

-Both people in the marriage are on the same page about property. If you both want the house, prepare for the long, expensive haul for your divorce. If you’re like me, and you don’t care about the house, or the car, or the timeshare in the Caymans, then you’ve got a good shot of walking away with only moderate pain.

Really, in general, I recommend people try to limit these three things throughout life just as a matter of regular practice. Having too many kids or getting all tangled up in attachments and property is just a lot of trouble. If you’ve been wise, as I have been, and keep your life simple, you can expect, as in all things, a simple divorce.

And really, compared to what I see on TV or read about online, it seems like simple is really the way to be when it comes to divorces.

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